Today, I had one of those rare things - a Monday off work. They're brilliant in theory, but when all your friends are at work and your money ran out two weeks ago, what do you do with them?
After sleeping 'till lunchtime and then logging into my work email to pre-stress myself for tomorrow, I engaged in intense conversation with my cat. We cut that short though after a minor disagreement (she's clearly quite insane. Mrrrreowr is not, and never has been, more historically important than Purrrrr, Purrrrrr!). She gave me one of those looks and stalked off to try and adopt the neighbours again, so I said "fine!" and went in search of more erudite entertainment.
The stack of unwashed dishes looked appealing until I thought I saw something move in there - then I decided they were best left well enough alone. So I crawled back to bed to indulge in a little Geek TV. Wonders of the day include:
Legend of the Seeker
I'm embarassed to discover that this was filmed in New Zealand. And it has Jay Laga'aia in it. I've never read Terry Goodkind's Sword of Truth books, which the series is based on, but I think my sister once said he's alright so I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt and thinking they must have butchered his stories.
The costumes look like something from an op-shop, it's full of hammy bit-part acting, and the overly-intense main characters wouldn't recognise humour if it turned into a magical vine and bit them on the ass. The plot 'twists' are laughable, and given away in the first two minutes by the use of a couple of significant utterances. Helpfully, in case you're particularly stupid, they let you know an utterance is significant by pausing for a moment after saying it and looking even more somber. Each episode is peppered with slow-motion sword-fighting scenes where the hot chick companion whirls around unnecessarily so her hair looks pretty and her dress billows out.
I have a guilty love for this show. Sure, it's slow, we already know what's going to happen and the execution scenes are unwatchably graphic (I hide my eyes behind my hands and squeal like a little girl - don't tell anyone). But the costumes are amazing. The one disbelief I haven't been able to suspend, however, is that everyone in the sixteenth-century UK was beautiful and they all had perfect teeth. I mean, look at British people now, and then imagine them without electric toothbrushes. Shudder.
The best thing I watched all day (despite the cliffhanger ending, and having to wait a whole week to see how he'll weasel himself out of this mess!). I have to admit I love Matt Smith. Matt, I apologise, at first I thought no one could ever measure up to David Tennant. But you're right. Bowties are cool. Consider my imaginary engagement to David null and void - my heart now belongs only to you.
Now I'm sick of TV and the dishes are moving again. I'm frightened. I think a drink will fix it. I'm coming, pub!